August 18, 2009
Gah! I am so annoyed. It’s amazing how a little conversation can send me into orbit.
We had little man tonight and when we were reading him a story, he was acting weird. Ie… knocking on his glasses for no reason, trying to stick his hand in his mouth, staring into space for a LONG time, even when we said his name many times…This is not a normal thing for him. Then before that, he said he was getting sick. (Something I think his mommy is telling him.) I don’t know. Something about him is different than other kids. Not in a bad way, just different. Unusual. I can’t place what it is. I asked Hubby if he has had developmental testing and he said that he has, and is up to par. Then I was thinking that maybe his IQ is higher than most, some people who are super smart are kind of off socially. Not that he is socially retarded, but he is off. Maybe in his own genius world.
Maybe I’m the one who’s off. I know nothing about kids.
I feel like sometimes I’m the only one in his life who doesn’t put him on a pedestal.
He is a kid. Maybe a bit above average in book smarts, but strange in other areas. I wonder if all kids are like this? I wonder if I am the one who has the issues sometimes, because when I voice my opinions or concerns, it seems like I’m the one who needs testing. Or that because I don’t have my own children that I birthed from my vag, that I don’t know my ass from a hole in the ground. That is how it seems to come back at me…
{This is how I feel when I speak my truth to my husband}
Is it normal to wonder these things about your stepchild? Or am I really the wicked stepmother?
I just remember how my little brother was at this age and I don’t remember him being so strange. Yes, he WAS strange! He was my weird little brother, of course he was strange, but in a cool kind of way. He was the kind of kid you always wanted to be around. I can only take little man in small doses until I break and want him to go play in the street. (I kid! I do not want him to play in the street, it’s an expression!)
I hate how all of the adults in little mans life, sans me, think he is SOOO smart. He is smart, but no brighter than any other kid his age. He should actually be able to do a little more, in my opinion.
For whatever reason, I am having a really fucking hard time trying to say what it is that I’m trying to say!
This is only frustrating me even more!!!!!!!!!
Okay, fuck it,
I’m going to finish my drink, smoke a cigarette and call it a night. Hopefully it’ll go away.
This feeling of whatever I can’t seem to form words for.
Gah! I am so annoyed. It’s amazing how a little conversation can send me into orbit.
We had little man tonight and when we were reading him a story, he was acting weird. Ie… knocking on his glasses for no reason, trying to stick his hand in his mouth, staring into space for a LONG time, even when we said his name many times…This is not a normal thing for him. Then before that, he said he was getting sick. (Something I think his mommy is telling him.) I don’t know. Something about him is different than other kids. Not in a bad way, just different. Unusual. I can’t place what it is. I asked Hubby if he has had developmental testing and he said that he has, and is up to par. Then I was thinking that maybe his IQ is higher than most, some people who are super smart are kind of off socially. Not that he is socially retarded, but he is off. Maybe in his own genius world.
Maybe I’m the one who’s off. I know nothing about kids.
I feel like sometimes I’m the only one in his life who doesn’t put him on a pedestal.
He is a kid. Maybe a bit above average in book smarts, but strange in other areas. I wonder if all kids are like this? I wonder if I am the one who has the issues sometimes, because when I voice my opinions or concerns, it seems like I’m the one who needs testing. Or that because I don’t have my own children that I birthed from my vag, that I don’t know my ass from a hole in the ground. That is how it seems to come back at me…
{This is how I feel when I speak my truth to my husband}
Is it normal to wonder these things about your stepchild? Or am I really the wicked stepmother?
I just remember how my little brother was at this age and I don’t remember him being so strange. Yes, he WAS strange! He was my weird little brother, of course he was strange, but in a cool kind of way. He was the kind of kid you always wanted to be around. I can only take little man in small doses until I break and want him to go play in the street. (I kid! I do not want him to play in the street, it’s an expression!)
I hate how all of the adults in little mans life, sans me, think he is SOOO smart. He is smart, but no brighter than any other kid his age. He should actually be able to do a little more, in my opinion.
For whatever reason, I am having a really fucking hard time trying to say what it is that I’m trying to say!
This is only frustrating me even more!!!!!!!!!
Okay, fuck it,
I’m going to finish my drink, smoke a cigarette and call it a night. Hopefully it’ll go away.
This feeling of whatever I can’t seem to form words for.
No comments:
Post a Comment