Curve balls.

There are days when the Universe throws you a curve ball.

Today, I was thrown one, and I hit it!! ... Then it landed in left field which caused me to lose the game of today.

My patience has been tried to the point of no return (and to Jack and coke). The drama that follows my life choices are smothering me today. I just want to be chill. I want a normal(ish) life. I would like to not have to hear that people are playing games. I would like my husband to be happy and not deal with bull shit. I would like to not cry. I would like for myself to flourish; be who I truly am. I wonder at times how I'm going to get through this without a substance abuse problem! lol. When all this is said and done, will I look back at this and laugh? Probably not. Will it make me realize what I have when it's finally over? Make me see the bright side of life?

Can I see the bright side to now? I have a perma-scowl going on right now and I hate it. It takes more muscles to frown than smile; my face is getting a serious workout.

I feel very alone tonight.

I feel secluded.

Overlooked.

Mean.

Wrong.

Justified.

Confused.

I am questioning my every move.

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Always keep a bottle of champagne in your refrigerator.

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